In this post: We’ll descuss dad’s role in labor. Labor and delivery for dads is very different than it is for moms, but no less scary than for moms
You got her pregnant. That much is clear. It’s obviously all your fault, needless to say that it certainly takes two to tango in the world of making babies (and frankly, also with the tango). You’re here with her in the hospital, bored out of your mind with a miserable wife. You aren’t really sure of your place now. You’ve already done your deed.
Part of you wishes that you could go back to the 1950’s where you could wait in the waiting room and just watch some mind-numbing TV while the nurses take care of everything else.
But, that is not the generation you live in. You will get the enormous pleasure of meeting your new baby as he/she enters the world, likely before the person who has made his body.
You are this baby’s dad.
You will be more involved in his/her life than any other generation ahead of you. And that starts now.
BTW, don’t miss my hospital packing list — there’s even a section on what Dad should bring!
But, that isn’t to say that many dads make some serious faux pas in the delivery room. Let’s discuss.
1. Complain. My husband kept complaining how cold it was in the labor room. Over, and over and over…. As the doctor ripped (and I do mean ripped) a baby out of my loins, my poor husband was cold. Do you sense how sad this makes me?
2. Eat super smelly, tasty food. Your wife, likely, can’t eat (if she can, by all means get you both something!). You go to KFC and get a 9 piece meal and proceed to eat in front of her, plan on it being more like 6 months of pelvic rest if you know what I mean {wink, wink, nudge-nudge}. Some wives really don’t care, but many do.
It is smart to find an appropriate time to step out and grab something at the cafeteria. It will do you good to stretch your legs, and it will give your wife a little time off from being a “watched pot”.
3. Not eating. So many dads want to keep solidarity with their wife that they, too, won’t eat.
I hope they enjoy eating the floor because having a baby, even when everything is perfectly normal, is a tense situation. For you (and most people), it’s not something you see every day.
So, while I don’t recommend #2, I DO recommend getting SOMETHING to eat. In my post what to pack in my hospital bag I do recommend that dads bring a few snacks in their bag. Something like trail mix is great. Most hospitals even have a fridge area that you could put a little snack as well (just make sure you label it).
4. Acting like they’re the patient. Oh, you want some juice and a warm blanket? Well, get pregnant and I’ll be sure to grab that for you.
No, I can’t give you a Tylenol, no while I’m running to grab your wife an epidural I am not going to stop to get you juice. You are completely capable and I will certainly show you where you can grab those things.
5. Leaving too often. Want to go play a game of pool? You should have thought of that 9 months ago!
I once had a poor 16 year old mom who’s baby daddy had gone to get her something to eat. I kept offering her something of my own but she insisted that he would be back soon to feed her. When she finally got hold of him, he was at the pool hall. For real. {Ding-ding}, that girl has a winner! Nice choice of baby daddy.
6. Too intrigued in the lady parts. Yes, it’s a baby exit area, not currently a playground, but if you’re way too excited about that area it turns alarms on in my head.
If you’re videoing for hours while the head isn’t even crowning, that’s weird. I once had a teenage mom, who’s boyfriend kept videoing her pushing (with very little progress- we were early in pushing) while her mom sat there and watched it. It was so weird. I finally asked him to stop. I mostly was just picturing about what social media that video would end up on.
7. The best thing to do is to ask how you can help. Your first response might not be the right one. She might want you to rub her back or you might smell, and she hates you. Who knows, and it might change every minute.
Let her run the remote, if she’d like.
Get her the phone, make sure her charger is within reach.
Know where the chapstick and scrunchie are (more about that here).
Try to be helpful to the nurse. Listen to what she asks.
Be aware of your own limits. If you’re not feeling well, sit down. Yes, your wife will not think you’re as manly, but she won’t want to hit you like she would be if you actually fainted.
Ready to be a power couple in your delivery?
Check out my online prenatal class for couples. Great questions to help you learn together and get ready for the big day! I know you’ll do great with this class behind you! This is one of the RARE classes that really takes the COUPLE into point with their class. Do it together!
This is one of the RARE classes that really takes the COUPLE into point with their class. I am a firm believer that pregnancy/delivery starts your baby’s life with you doing it together!
I even have a free beginning class:
Being a dad is so amazing, be sure to get started on the right foot! Hopefully you found these tips helpful.
My whole page answering the big question am I in labor? Has all the best links for that!
And don’t miss my page weeks of pregnancy — great for people just starting out on their pregnancy journey:
Want more labor tips — be sure to sign up for my pregnancy emails, and check out all my other delivery tips below that!
Original article and pictures take www.pullingcurls.com site
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